They all had moments of feeling hopeless through that torture.
There was no way they couldn't have had those moments, thinking they wouldn't get out of it again. Now that they are all here, now that they are all on the other side, it's different, and Logan refuses to lose any one of them after everything they went through. Logan doesn't know if it's hope that he has or if he- if it's just irrational determination.
They all look and feel broken down to the depths of themselves, and it's written on all of their faces. Mot of them aren't talking. Most of them are still waiting on edge. They're still waiting for something to shift and to change and to be told they have to go back, but they don't.
Lucien is dead.
He has to be dead. This has to be over.
And he doesn't want to think of the possibility that he could be anything but. Lucien needs to be dead after what he did to all of hi brothers, to all of these people. There was no preparing for it though Adam tried to, but even he couldn't explain how much worse it would get or anticipate.
All Adam knew was his time slowly unwinding, how he'd kill him when he was annoyed with him, and it was a sign to that psychosis but it didn't show how deep it really went. There was no anticipating it, and Logan hasn't had the chance to talk to Adam, because Adam stayed behind to make sure Lucien was dead but... he'll want to.
It seems stupid holding on to anything like anger when it's-- when they all figured out how easily it could all be lost. He was seconds away from death before Lucien was killed, fell dead. And he needs his whole family, everyone they care about to be- to be alive and to have a chance still at happiness... at something.
Logan stays close to him, watching, waiting, willing to run in in a second if there's-- if there's anything that he can do, and he has to believe something- it's not all lost.
No, Ethan has never faced and never seen that side of Elena up close. It wouldn't surprise him if he had time to think about it, and he has likely seen hints and evidence of it up until that point.
However, never was he put in that position where she was willing to sacrifice her life for his, where she was willing to let herself be torn to pieces. It wasn't even an easy death that was part of what was killing him. He can understand wanting an escape, but she-- she would have been torn to shreds.
Slowly while she screamed for it to end and it wouldn't have ended for such a long time.
It wasn't just death but inexplicable pain that she was willing to go through before letting him die even if he would have died anyway.
Ethan breathes in through the fire, the shakiness of the air in his chest as her hands rest delicately against his face. There is nothing he wants more than to grab hold of her even if it is not real and nothing he is more terrified of than trying and finding he just rips her apart instead. His hands curl in on themselves, trembling as they pull away from her.
"Not your blood," he repeats, and he doesn't think that his own mind-- if he was hallucinating, he doesn't think he's have Elena in his mind be so angry against Lucien when it was his claws that ripped her apart. Even if he is angry at Lucien, he'd want her angry at him if he did hallucinate her, tearing her apart.
His hands rest curled up against him, against his stomach as he looks at her with longing and wanting and needing to believe it, needing to believe it's true, but he's shaking. I love you, she says, and that's what breaks him, what makes his face crumple as he sobs just a little but it's feeling. It's not nothing, it's so far from nothing, it's starting to burn through him. I love you from the mouth of someone he would have ripped apart when he can't love himself, when he can't do anything but hate and fear himself, and she's here- someone like- she's here to love him and to be loved by him, and this has to be real because if he wakes up on that cell.
He will find the closest way to kill himself.
"I lo- I love you too."
And they were the only ones in the- in the dark cell, on the floor of the cell whispering that to each other. She is the only one who would know it so it can't- it can't be a trick. It has to be real or a hallucination or-
Ethan breathes in as he focuses on the feel of her hand against the back of his neck. It feels like her hand. She feels like her from what he can feel.
He looks at her for a long moment, and he shakes his head. If it's real, it has to b real. There are no other options, he wouldn't- he can't.
Logan doesn't need anything else othr than that, other than her looking over at them. He walks over to her side, placing his hand on her other shoulder. "She's here. We're real, this is really happening," he say quietly but firmly, insistently before he steps back again when Connor does.
Ethan looks at her when she slips her hands up to his face, and he looks at her, her face. God, he could never stand seeing her sad, and it's all- all coming back to him through the bile, the fire that's been shoved down into his stomach.
"I trust you."
He does. God, he does, and he doesn't trust himself, but he can trust her. He can trust what she is saying. Ethan can trust in what she is saying, and she is saying that she is real and she is here, and he didn't kill her. It's hitting, the realization falls over him.
"It's you," Ethan says almost wonderingly like it is finally clicking in his head, in all of him. His mouth slightly open as he shakes his head, and he is so over come with relief and with love for her that he doesn't think for this moment to be too afraid to touch her.
"It's you. You're not dead. I didn't ri- rip you apart, it's you." His chest tightens as his face crumples. "Elena."
He reaches for her, pulls her in against his chest, lifting her up against him, and wrapping his arms around you. Ethan buries his face against her neck as he keeps her close to him, ignoring how his arms shake, how the panic starts to set in again, because she's alive.
Elena is alive, and she's hurting, and she's-- she's alive.
Not taken from this world, not by him, not by anything or anyone.
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There was no way they couldn't have had those moments, thinking they wouldn't get out of it again. Now that they are all here, now that they are all on the other side, it's different, and Logan refuses to lose any one of them after everything they went through. Logan doesn't know if it's hope that he has or if he- if it's just irrational determination.
They all look and feel broken down to the depths of themselves, and it's written on all of their faces. Mot of them aren't talking. Most of them are still waiting on edge. They're still waiting for something to shift and to change and to be told they have to go back, but they don't.
Lucien is dead.
He has to be dead. This has to be over.
And he doesn't want to think of the possibility that he could be anything but. Lucien needs to be dead after what he did to all of hi brothers, to all of these people. There was no preparing for it though Adam tried to, but even he couldn't explain how much worse it would get or anticipate.
All Adam knew was his time slowly unwinding, how he'd kill him when he was annoyed with him, and it was a sign to that psychosis but it didn't show how deep it really went. There was no anticipating it, and Logan hasn't had the chance to talk to Adam, because Adam stayed behind to make sure Lucien was dead but... he'll want to.
It seems stupid holding on to anything like anger when it's-- when they all figured out how easily it could all be lost. He was seconds away from death before Lucien was killed, fell dead. And he needs his whole family, everyone they care about to be- to be alive and to have a chance still at happiness... at something.
Logan stays close to him, watching, waiting, willing to run in in a second if there's-- if there's anything that he can do, and he has to believe something- it's not all lost.
No, Ethan has never faced and never seen that side of Elena up close. It wouldn't surprise him if he had time to think about it, and he has likely seen hints and evidence of it up until that point.
However, never was he put in that position where she was willing to sacrifice her life for his, where she was willing to let herself be torn to pieces. It wasn't even an easy death that was part of what was killing him. He can understand wanting an escape, but she-- she would have been torn to shreds.
Slowly while she screamed for it to end and it wouldn't have ended for such a long time.
It wasn't just death but inexplicable pain that she was willing to go through before letting him die even if he would have died anyway.
Ethan breathes in through the fire, the shakiness of the air in his chest as her hands rest delicately against his face. There is nothing he wants more than to grab hold of her even if it is not real and nothing he is more terrified of than trying and finding he just rips her apart instead. His hands curl in on themselves, trembling as they pull away from her.
"Not your blood," he repeats, and he doesn't think that his own mind-- if he was hallucinating, he doesn't think he's have Elena in his mind be so angry against Lucien when it was his claws that ripped her apart. Even if he is angry at Lucien, he'd want her angry at him if he did hallucinate her, tearing her apart.
His hands rest curled up against him, against his stomach as he looks at her with longing and wanting and needing to believe it, needing to believe it's true, but he's shaking. I love you, she says, and that's what breaks him, what makes his face crumple as he sobs just a little but it's feeling. It's not nothing, it's so far from nothing, it's starting to burn through him. I love you from the mouth of someone he would have ripped apart when he can't love himself, when he can't do anything but hate and fear himself, and she's here- someone like- she's here to love him and to be loved by him, and this has to be real because if he wakes up on that cell.
He will find the closest way to kill himself.
"I lo- I love you too."
And they were the only ones in the- in the dark cell, on the floor of the cell whispering that to each other. She is the only one who would know it so it can't- it can't be a trick. It has to be real or a hallucination or-
Ethan breathes in as he focuses on the feel of her hand against the back of his neck. It feels like her hand. She feels like her from what he can feel.
He looks at her for a long moment, and he shakes his head. If it's real, it has to b real. There are no other options, he wouldn't- he can't.
Logan doesn't need anything else othr than that, other than her looking over at them. He walks over to her side, placing his hand on her other shoulder. "She's here. We're real, this is really happening," he say quietly but firmly, insistently before he steps back again when Connor does.
Ethan looks at her when she slips her hands up to his face, and he looks at her, her face. God, he could never stand seeing her sad, and it's all- all coming back to him through the bile, the fire that's been shoved down into his stomach.
"I trust you."
He does. God, he does, and he doesn't trust himself, but he can trust her. He can trust what she is saying. Ethan can trust in what she is saying, and she is saying that she is real and she is here, and he didn't kill her. It's hitting, the realization falls over him.
"It's you," Ethan says almost wonderingly like it is finally clicking in his head, in all of him. His mouth slightly open as he shakes his head, and he is so over come with relief and with love for her that he doesn't think for this moment to be too afraid to touch her.
"It's you. You're not dead. I didn't ri- rip you apart, it's you." His chest tightens as his face crumples. "Elena."
He reaches for her, pulls her in against his chest, lifting her up against him, and wrapping his arms around you. Ethan buries his face against her neck as he keeps her close to him, ignoring how his arms shake, how the panic starts to set in again, because she's alive.
Elena is alive, and she's hurting, and she's-- she's alive.
Not taken from this world, not by him, not by anything or anyone.