They had no control, no power, no way to stop it from happening or expect it happening at all.
The whole gala went to hell as they were being driven away in separate vans to some place so far out of the city that it would be impossible for anyone to hear them scream. It’s what Ethan thought while they were driving out to the place that was so far away in the woods, didn’t even know it existed out there. He thought about how no one would find them there. No one would think to look there. No one would hear any sounds or signs of anything from that house because it was so far away from the city.
None of them have had the chance to think that far ahead yet. It’s all been about survival, about pushing through the really painful torture and trying to find each other again, which was made impossible. They never or rarely saw each other, and it was completely controlled as to who would end up at the dinners and who would not. Some more sick mind games to keep them occupied.. to keep Lucien occupied, entertained.
It’s what it all was about in the end. Lucien wanted to be entertained. He could have had his stupid ceremony if he’d done that first thing, but it was like he wanted to play with his food before eating it. Ethan has a feeling he was really testing the Hales out, seeing which ones would really be worth keeping, breaking, and molding, and which would be better killed. The default would have been to kill the oldest ones, because the younger ones were closer to perfection.
However, he likely wanted to make sure that the default decision was the right one, and what better way to do that than through tests? He wanted to play with Sarah to be sure that she had the fire that so draws him in, and he needed to figure out if the Gilberts were worth keeping around and to what capacity they were. They are very good motivators. It’s something he learned quickly into the game, the night of the dinner party after all.
Killing Jeremy got an immediate fiery reaction from Sarah, which resulted in a reaction of his own, but that is what draws him in and what keeps the game fresh.
It was not enough for him to be returned to his full power. He wanted toys. He wanted little birds to break and fires to put out, and the group together ended up being such a powerful cocktail of all the things that draws him in most. It was too much to resist, and it was part of his downfall. If he had only done the ceremony more quickly, that night that he’d taken them, it never would have failed and he never would have died.
And he has to be dead.
Logan doesn’t think he or his brothers or anyone else that had been there will rest until he is dead. They will always have to look over their shoulder otherwise, and he has to be gone, drowned in his own blood. He doesn’t care. He doesn’t care as long as he’s gone, and it’s over.
They all need this to be over with, and he knows the dark sides of his brothers (of him) that have been brought out. The darkness in all of them, but he believes they can all remind each other of who they are, of who they were. They will never be the same. It’s impossible to go through what they have and be the same, and Logan doesn’t need them to be the same. He just needs them to be with him.
The expression on Connor’s face hurts, the nothingness in Ethan’s hurts, the look in Alek’s eyes hurts, and it’s enough to make him want to destroy something right now. There’s just nowhere to turn with that anger and protectiveness as much as it claws at his chest and tightens painfully in the center of him there.
And he just needs Lucien to be dead, for him to leave everyone alone and never bother them again because they are all left with scars now, they will all have nightmares. There’s no washing that time away completely, not for anyone. It’s going to be a part of them from here on out.
It would be exhausting moving and moving and moving again. Ethan, if he were thinking properly (and when he does think properly again), knows that she would not have stopped fighting to get to him that whole time that he was unresponsive in his cell. She would have tried everything so he didn’t have to live on more moment thinking that what had happened had happened.
They are just continuously shown that they are powerless in so many circumstances, but it never stops her from fighting again and again. Elena wouldn’t have let him die, and he wouldn’t have been able to go through with it with her right there and the look on her face as he tried. Her hope was something he held on to too, and it’s a good thing she didn’t let him die.
Given, the fact that it wasn’t real. It was all a test. If she had let him die there, he would have stayed dead and that would have been real and Elena would have been killed after that. No sense in having a motivator for someone who is no longer around, but it didn’t happen. They lived through it, and somehow Ethan is finding his way out of the nothingness because it’s Elena whose hands are on his face, whose lips are against his forehead, pulling him out of it.
Ethan looks up at her and nods. His hands are still shaking but they weren’t- they didn’t rip anyone apart, didn’t rip her apart.
“I didn’t kill anyone,” he repeats it, letting it hang out in the air between them. It feels wrong. He believed for so many hours that he had torn her to pieces and eaten- eaten her in the process, but to admit that it hadn’t happened… it’s something else. It’s something frightening.
Because he doesn’t want to crash down again if this isn’t true, if it’s some elaborate hallucination, he can’t- It was completely out of his control, ,and he tried so hard, harder than he had in his whole life to control it, but he couldn’t stop it, bones crunching lowly as he tried to hold on. And he would never, ever hurt her if he had the choice. He would hurt himself before he did.
Ethan looks at her, tears in his eyes as he nods. “N- no one ever said I had good timing,” he says finally, brokenly, somehow managing to joke along with her though which is something, which is amazing given he couldn’t even speak before she walked into the room.
There’s so much gratitude. Logan is thanking… thanking someone too, and he looks over at Connor, small smile, small smile of relief, because it is flooding through him. It’s a breakthrough. It’s that hope. It’s better than the husk that he had become, and now they can.. can figure everything else out.
It just wasn’t something he could leave alone.
“I… I knew you would,” Ethan says, voice hoarse but still that certainty in his tone. The tears that burn at his eyes slip down his face, but he nods, pushing through it, jaw locking a little as he works the words out from where they’re trapped inside of his chest. “You would have fought as soon as you- you realized, but they were too- too strong. It’s okay. Th- thank you for fighting for me, Elena... that night and the whole day after and- and just now.”
The sincerity that he says the words with is impossible to describe, but he means that. Even if he hadn’t been aware of it at the time, he knows- knows she would have fought people, walls a hundred times stronger than him, ran to him directly as soon as she could to not waste a second.
He pulls her in against him and then back against the bed with the weight of her on top of him. It’s that much easier to focus, because the whole of him knows it’s her, knows she’s alive with that constant reminder right there against his chest.
Ethan backs up enough to see her close her eyes tightly against tears and he shakes his head, kissing her eyelids. “It’s okay. It’s okay to cry,” he says after a moment. “It’s over.” Right now, it’s over. That night is over. It’s still with them, and it will always be with them but they’re on the other side of it, and he can’t linger on how terrified she must have been that night, terrified of that monster, terrified of all of it. Ethan knows for certain that he won’t always be able to touch her this easily, but the relief and the love that he has for her and the fact that she is alive overwhelms him.
Leaves nothing else, and he cradles her face and he kisses her eyelids as she shuts her eyes tight against tears, and he tells her, “It’s okay” to let go, to give in, to be here with him, to not keep fighting and keep pushing and keep trying to get through but to stop.
And he doesn’t need her to not cry or to fight for him right now, he’s here, she’s brought him back, and she can stop fighting, stop pushing on and on and on again.
He closes his eyes listening to those words. She knows he would never hurt her. She loves him like he loves her. They love each other. She’s here.
She’s here. She’shere. Sheshere.sheshere. here here here. Right here, with him, on top of him, inhis arms, and she was not taken.
“I love you too, and- and I’m here too. You brought me back,” Ethan says softly as he leans in to kiss her on the lips this time, sliding his hands and his arms across her back and keeping her there against him.
no subject
The whole gala went to hell as they were being driven away in separate vans to some place so far out of the city that it would be impossible for anyone to hear them scream. It’s what Ethan thought while they were driving out to the place that was so far away in the woods, didn’t even know it existed out there. He thought about how no one would find them there. No one would think to look there. No one would hear any sounds or signs of anything from that house because it was so far away from the city.
None of them have had the chance to think that far ahead yet. It’s all been about survival, about pushing through the really painful torture and trying to find each other again, which was made impossible. They never or rarely saw each other, and it was completely controlled as to who would end up at the dinners and who would not. Some more sick mind games to keep them occupied.. to keep Lucien occupied, entertained.
It’s what it all was about in the end. Lucien wanted to be entertained. He could have had his stupid ceremony if he’d done that first thing, but it was like he wanted to play with his food before eating it. Ethan has a feeling he was really testing the Hales out, seeing which ones would really be worth keeping, breaking, and molding, and which would be better killed. The default would have been to kill the oldest ones, because the younger ones were closer to perfection.
However, he likely wanted to make sure that the default decision was the right one, and what better way to do that than through tests? He wanted to play with Sarah to be sure that she had the fire that so draws him in, and he needed to figure out if the Gilberts were worth keeping around and to what capacity they were. They are very good motivators. It’s something he learned quickly into the game, the night of the dinner party after all.
Killing Jeremy got an immediate fiery reaction from Sarah, which resulted in a reaction of his own, but that is what draws him in and what keeps the game fresh.
It was not enough for him to be returned to his full power. He wanted toys. He wanted little birds to break and fires to put out, and the group together ended up being such a powerful cocktail of all the things that draws him in most. It was too much to resist, and it was part of his downfall. If he had only done the ceremony more quickly, that night that he’d taken them, it never would have failed and he never would have died.
And he has to be dead.
Logan doesn’t think he or his brothers or anyone else that had been there will rest until he is dead. They will always have to look over their shoulder otherwise, and he has to be gone, drowned in his own blood. He doesn’t care. He doesn’t care as long as he’s gone, and it’s over.
They all need this to be over with, and he knows the dark sides of his brothers (of him) that have been brought out. The darkness in all of them, but he believes they can all remind each other of who they are, of who they were. They will never be the same. It’s impossible to go through what they have and be the same, and Logan doesn’t need them to be the same. He just needs them to be with him.
The expression on Connor’s face hurts, the nothingness in Ethan’s hurts, the look in Alek’s eyes hurts, and it’s enough to make him want to destroy something right now. There’s just nowhere to turn with that anger and protectiveness as much as it claws at his chest and tightens painfully in the center of him there.
And he just needs Lucien to be dead, for him to leave everyone alone and never bother them again because they are all left with scars now, they will all have nightmares. There’s no washing that time away completely, not for anyone. It’s going to be a part of them from here on out.
It would be exhausting moving and moving and moving again. Ethan, if he were thinking properly (and when he does think properly again), knows that she would not have stopped fighting to get to him that whole time that he was unresponsive in his cell. She would have tried everything so he didn’t have to live on more moment thinking that what had happened had happened.
They are just continuously shown that they are powerless in so many circumstances, but it never stops her from fighting again and again. Elena wouldn’t have let him die, and he wouldn’t have been able to go through with it with her right there and the look on her face as he tried. Her hope was something he held on to too, and it’s a good thing she didn’t let him die.
Given, the fact that it wasn’t real. It was all a test. If she had let him die there, he would have stayed dead and that would have been real and Elena would have been killed after that. No sense in having a motivator for someone who is no longer around, but it didn’t happen. They lived through it, and somehow Ethan is finding his way out of the nothingness because it’s Elena whose hands are on his face, whose lips are against his forehead, pulling him out of it.
Ethan looks up at her and nods. His hands are still shaking but they weren’t- they didn’t rip anyone apart, didn’t rip her apart.
“I didn’t kill anyone,” he repeats it, letting it hang out in the air between them. It feels wrong. He believed for so many hours that he had torn her to pieces and eaten- eaten her in the process, but to admit that it hadn’t happened… it’s something else. It’s something frightening.
Because he doesn’t want to crash down again if this isn’t true, if it’s some elaborate hallucination, he can’t- It was completely out of his control, ,and he tried so hard, harder than he had in his whole life to control it, but he couldn’t stop it, bones crunching lowly as he tried to hold on. And he would never, ever hurt her if he had the choice. He would hurt himself before he did.
Ethan looks at her, tears in his eyes as he nods. “N- no one ever said I had good timing,” he says finally, brokenly, somehow managing to joke along with her though which is something, which is amazing given he couldn’t even speak before she walked into the room.
There’s so much gratitude. Logan is thanking… thanking someone too, and he looks over at Connor, small smile, small smile of relief, because it is flooding through him. It’s a breakthrough. It’s that hope. It’s better than the husk that he had become, and now they can.. can figure everything else out.
It just wasn’t something he could leave alone.
“I… I knew you would,” Ethan says, voice hoarse but still that certainty in his tone. The tears that burn at his eyes slip down his face, but he nods, pushing through it, jaw locking a little as he works the words out from where they’re trapped inside of his chest. “You would have fought as soon as you- you realized, but they were too- too strong. It’s okay. Th- thank you for fighting for me, Elena... that night and the whole day after and- and just now.”
The sincerity that he says the words with is impossible to describe, but he means that. Even if he hadn’t been aware of it at the time, he knows- knows she would have fought people, walls a hundred times stronger than him, ran to him directly as soon as she could to not waste a second.
He pulls her in against him and then back against the bed with the weight of her on top of him. It’s that much easier to focus, because the whole of him knows it’s her, knows she’s alive with that constant reminder right there against his chest.
Ethan backs up enough to see her close her eyes tightly against tears and he shakes his head, kissing her eyelids. “It’s okay. It’s okay to cry,” he says after a moment. “It’s over.” Right now, it’s over. That night is over. It’s still with them, and it will always be with them but they’re on the other side of it, and he can’t linger on how terrified she must have been that night, terrified of that monster, terrified of all of it. Ethan knows for certain that he won’t always be able to touch her this easily, but the relief and the love that he has for her and the fact that she is alive overwhelms him.
Leaves nothing else, and he cradles her face and he kisses her eyelids as she shuts her eyes tight against tears, and he tells her, “It’s okay” to let go, to give in, to be here with him, to not keep fighting and keep pushing and keep trying to get through but to stop.
And he doesn’t need her to not cry or to fight for him right now, he’s here, she’s brought him back, and she can stop fighting, stop pushing on and on and on again.
He closes his eyes listening to those words. She knows he would never hurt her. She loves him like he loves her. They love each other. She’s here.
She’s here. She’shere. Sheshere.sheshere. here here here. Right here, with him, on top of him, inhis arms, and she was not taken.
“I love you too, and- and I’m here too. You brought me back,” Ethan says softly as he leans in to kiss her on the lips this time, sliding his hands and his arms across her back and keeping her there against him.
“It’s okay.”